Brad and Angelina—Back Off Press

Yes, it’s true that Angelina –Jolie filed for divorce against her husband of two years Brad Pitt. Here’s the thing though folks, divorce is a sad thing and shouldn’t be a media circus.

If we’re honest, marriage is supposed to be an everlasting union, NOT a media event for everyone ELSE to whoop and holler, and carry on like it’s the biggest thing since French Toast and Maple Syrup.

Personally, I feel sorry for both of them. After all, they actually have been together for 14 years now, and have 6 kids to love and tend to. How in the HELL is the media frenzy gonna make that any easier.

Let’s face it, Brad is being hounded, Angelina is being hunted down like a wounded animal for comment, JUST so the “PEOPLE” can get their noses filled with what really happened in their marriage.

I say, leave them the HELL alone, and let THEM figure it out. In MY opinion, there should NOT be any “THRILL” in having two people who have loved each other for 14 years be tortured and hunted for comments.

Just because they are Hollywood Legends, does NOT give the press, the right to Enhance their pain that they are both going through. Leave them alone and let them sort out their OWN problems.

This is MY two cents worth.

Until Later…

 

 

Flower in the Sun

lone_flower

For those of you who read poetry, but really don’t understand it, (Like ME for example), The flower is ,merely a metaphor for us Humans and the many needs and wants we desire.

The Sun represents our live when we are down and need a boost. The rain of course nurishes not only our bodies, but also our souls.

I hope you all enjoy this piece.

 

Below I sit, watching the sun’s rays, beating down upon my tiny body.

Pedals dried by the scorching sun, and my stem, withers in need of moisture’s touch.

Do not deny my life; but feed me with thy crying clouds,

Hear me, and let me soak up the essence of thy salvation.

 

Open the Heavens and soak me till I can stand no more.

If you heed my cry, I shall regain my posture, stand tall with pedals full, And Sing the praises of Natures virtue. 

I stand only because of you,                     

Bring forth thy rain and I shall respond in kind.

 

Just Ask Sooz

Dear Sooz:

My wife and I are house flippers. We buy houses that need a lot of work, fix them up, and then resell them. Let me say that we are very successful doing this except for one thing, my wife Barb.

You see Barb. Is an interior decorator that helps me design the houses that we fix. The problem is, she has champagne tastes and wants to buy all the expensive cabinets, counters, and flooring tile when it can be done cheaper and look just as nice.

I keep telling, and harping on her that the expenses for these houses are coming out of my pocket and would she please take it easy on my wallet. Nothing seems to work.

I also have deadlines to meet with a timetable in the house, so the bank doesn’t keep taking mortgage payments out before I can sell them. The more that Barb. adds, the more time it takes to finish them shattering many a timetable. After Barb. gets done, they do look great, but I don’t believe they are making us the amount extra that we spent for their install.

I don’t want to kick her off the projects as we have a lot of bonding time together, I just don’t want to over improve the houses in the areas that we deal with.

Can you help me show her that a buck can be stretched, yet still have the house will look good for resale in the area? I could really use your help.

Frustrated Flipper

 

Dear Frustrated Flipper:

Once you get the taste for champagne, you always keep the taste of champagne. Either fire her and have her go to work with someone else, OR, keep your trap shut and keep making money. Sorry, there is no stopping a spinning top. Be glad you have the bonding time and enjoy what you do.

 

 

 

 

 

Why Do Men Like Our Boobs

For years I have been wondering just what it IS about our boobs that men like so much? Let’s be honest, all they are, are feeding machines for our little ones.

Oh sure, they can be used as an erogenous zone in lovemaking, but primarily, they are muscles used for feeding our young. Is it because they are beautiful pieces of art like in the Aphrodite, or perhaps more of a leftover response from our youth when we used to suckle the boobs of our moms to eat and get that comforting feeling?

I am at a loss here, someone please enlighten me. Almost every culture seems to worship our breasts and I really don’t understand why. Perhaps it is because of their extreme softness or the added bonus of our nipples, work with me here people, and help me understand.

For ME, it’s about cuddling between two fluffy pillows and the way they smell, but, that’s ME. Let me understand, why do YOU think they are so popular? Let me know.

 

 

It’s Emmy Time Again

I’m not a big TV watcher so I really don’t KNOW who some of the stars are that are up for the Emmy’s, but, I do wonder what their feelings are toward their fellow contestants who are up for THEIR award.

For example, in the lead actress in a comedy series, what does Amy Schumer (Inside Amy Schumer), think about Julia Louis-Dreyfus (Veep); or Lily Tomlin (Grace and Frankie), about Laurie Metcalf (Getting On)?

Oh, I KNOW how they ACT on TV, Everyone is gracious, and ALL of the actresses selected for the nomination have been deemed to be the best actors since the Marlboro Man, who sat on his horse and lit up his death causing cigarette; but how do they REALLY feel?

Here is MY take on what they are REALLY thinking while spewing out all that graciousness on the tube:

Amy is thinking about Laurie– How in HELL did that bitch who played a NOTHING sister role in Rosanne EVER get another job? She’s about as funny as a house fire, how in the Hell did she get nominated anyway? She couldn’t even act her way out of a speeding ticket. Geese!!

Julia Louis-Dreyfus about Lily Tomlin– Oh no, NOT Lily again…Hasn’t she already received two or 3 Emmy’s for rockin’ in a freakin’ rockin’ chair? OK, she DID an OK job in that telephone operator skit, but Hell, that was 100 years ago. In FACT, THAT’s where SHE should be NOW, in her rockin’ chair, the broad is 77 years old. She won’t EVEN be able to accept the damn thing if she DOES win.

On and on it goes until the announcer finally unveils the winner, THEN, everything is Rainbows and Unicorns once again. Everybody loves everyone. Please, give me a break!!!

 

What Ever Happened to Flashing and Streaking

Hi everybody, let me just say this, I have been both a flasher AND a streaker. I know that must surprise most of you, but it’s true. When I was in college, the FIRST time, I would wait for the band to come out on the football field and then streak across like there was no tomorrow.

Was I ever caught, lets just say ONLY when I wanted to be. The same went for flashin’, at a concert or if I saw a really cute guy, I would give my coyesh smile and let him get a sneak preview of what COULD be.

Unfortunately, you don’t see that as often as you used to…Why? Nothin’ more excitin’ than a naked girl runnin’ in front of thousands of people, or givin’ a little flash to the gal/guy of your dreams.

First of all, let me ask YOU folks in the peanut gallery, would YOU like a little more excitement in your lives? I certainly would. I may just bring back my old college days again this football season, and maybe I’ll even do a flash or two. Look out you old Profs, Sooz is comin’.

Let’s “Bring Back the Fun to America Again”…Whose WITH me?

 

 

 

Just Ask Sooz

Dear Sooz:

I have a major problem and I was hoping you could give me some advice. You see Sooz, I have been having an affair with another man now for 3 years. He is not only sweet and kind, but he is also adventurous when it comes to sex.

Now to give you some background, my husband is also a sweet and kind loving man, he and I have been married now for over 20 years and our life has been very good. The problem is, he is 15 years my senior and has slowed down in the sexual department.

I need sex Sooz, and when I go to my husband about it, he just says that he will be better but never does. I know that having an affair is wrong, but I would miss the sex.

I am so torn; I don’t know what to do. You see, I love my husband, but I just can’t keep going without sex. What should I do?

Torn

 

Dear Torn:

I am NOT a priest honey; I can NOT condone your affair even though I understand what you are going through. If your husband ever found out do you think that HE would UNDERSTAND?

Since you tell me that you love your husband, my suggestion to you would be to Leave this affair behind and see if there is another way to stimulate your husband’s desire. Perhaps shots of Testosterone would help. Have him see a Urologist and see if there is something to re-light that fire over his balls.

While I have had sex with many a married man, I can NOT give you my blessing on this one…Sorry.

 

 

School Time for Sooz

Hi everyone, I am writing in between classes and I thought I would give you an inside view of my new life. School has begun and I already have all of my books. Wow, speaking of books, I couldn’t believe the cost of text books these days. These Professors, get rich from their students BUYING their books alone, to say nothing about actually teaching the classes.

I am settling in well and have already gotten my first crush on one of the Profs. What a cutie she is…Blond hair, beautiful bod. and a killer smile…I can see I MAY need some EXTRA help in THAT class.

I am up at the crack of dawn; primping, and making myself beautiful, so everyone will fawn over me. Is that a BAD thing, hehehehehe??? OK, so what, I AM a little vein, but I want to look GOOD don’t I?

Anyway, I have a class at 8:00AM and another one at 10:AM, then I go a few hours before taking one at 1PM, and my last one is at 3PM. Tomorrow, I have one of my favorite classes, The Study of the Criminal Mind. I am really looking forward to this class, maybe I’ll learn some interesting material.

College life is a little weird for me being in my forties, they’re many students who that are in their late 20’s or early 30’s. Making friends, however, is NO problem. God, sometimes I feel like I could be their mother….NO CRACKS FROM THE PEANUT GALLERY PLEASE!!!!

Other than that, I am keeping a low profile, not going to the pubs, and dancing wildly on top of the tables naked…YET, anyway. I am being a “good girl”, studying hard, and working to get straight A’s. I wanna graduate Magna Cum Laude, and I can do it…Fingers crossed…

Until Later…

 

Adult Poetry by Sooz

cherries47

I have had this one rolling inside me for a long time and I just HAD to let it out…Hope you like it anyway…

(To the tune of Pop goes the weasel)

 

All round the Johnson or Dick,

The girl chased balls that were hairy,

That’s the way the way game is played,

POP goes the Cherry!!!

Romance is in The Air

mothers-day-single-red-roses-60-charming-single-rose-arrangements-a-total-of-180-flowers-globalrose

Romance is in The Air

Today is Friday and I am feeling romantic, so I thought I would treat you to some of my favorite romantic poems. One of my favorites is by a brilliant poet, William Wadsworth, who wrote as if his emotion spilled out of his talented body.

“I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud” by William Wordsworth

   I wandered lonely as a cloud

   That floats on high o’er vales and hills,

   When all at once I saw a crowd,  

   A host, of golden daffodils;

   Beside the lake, beneath the trees,

   Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.

 

   Continuous as the stars that shine

   And twinkle on the milky way,

   They stretched in never-ending line

   Along the margin of a bay:

   Ten thousand saw I at a glance,

   Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.

 

   The waves beside them danced; but they

   Out-did the sparkling waves in glee:

   A poet could not but be gay,

   In such a jocund company:

   I gazed—and gazed—but little thought

   What wealth the show to me had brought:

 

   For oft, when on my couch I lie

   In vacant or in pensive mood,

   They flash upon that inward eye

   Which is the bliss of solitude;

   And then my heart with pleasure fills,

   And dances with the daffodils.

 

Of course, who could forget the beautiful and love filled poem by Robert Burns:

 

My Luve

O my luve is like a red, red rose,
That’s newly sprung in June:
O my luve is like the melodie,
That’s sweetly played in tune.

As fair art thou, my bonie lass,
So deep in luve am I;
And I will luve thee still, my dear,
Till a’ the seas gang dry.

Till a’ the seas gang dry, my dear,
And the rocks melt wi’ the sun;
And I will luve thee still my dear,
While the sands o’ life shall run.

And fare thee weel, my only luve!
And fare thee weel a while!
And I will come again, my luve,
Tho’ it were ten thousand mile.

I think my favorite love poem is inspired by Lord Byron and it goes like this:

She Walks in Beauty
Lord Byron (1788-1824)

The opening stanza is:

“She walks in beauty, like the night
Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that’s best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes;
Thus mellowed to that tender light
Which heaven to gaudy day denies.

Ahhhhhh, such romance, such beautiful words and thoughts by some of the greats. I hope you have enjoyed these and will share them with your significant other or sweetheart.