Tonight I’m going to talk about something near and dear to my heart…Spam. Now I’m not talking about computer spam, I’m talking about the real deal here, I mean the Cadillac of lunch meats, wait for it…..SPAM.
Now I know what you’re thinking, why on God’s green Earth would ANYONE wanna talk about a lunch meat in their blog? Well, I must admit, I just read a blog about COMPUTER spam and the way my mind works, it just NATURALLY went to the Mighty Python Spam song. Yup, that article, written about Computer spam ( A very funny piece, so much so that I almost peed myself ). Actually, now that I feel, I believe I DID wet myself, ANYWAY, I thought it might be fun to write about Spam.
Once upon a time , in a land far far away, (No wait, that’s a different story ),There was a German guy by the name of Hormel that took chopped pork shoulder meat, added a tiny bit of ham, added salt (so it would taste good), and potato starch as a binder. He ground it all up (yummy), and packed it tighter than my ASS on date night, and then called it Hormel’s spiced ham. WTF????? HELLO……it’s mostly pork?????
IS THAT MEAT??????
Making a long story short (no longer possible), the name wasn’t to popular and they finally changed it to:
Something Posing As Meat”, “Specially Processed Artificial Meat”, “Stuff, Pork and Ham”, “Spare Parts Animal Meat” and “Special Product of Austin Minnesota”. OK, I lied about those names, they really just called it plain old boring Spam, I just couldn’t help myself, again, my eviltwin has rubbed off on me.
Today, spam is sold all over the world, unfortunately, it is only eaten in Siberian prison camps as sustenance to just keep the prisoners alive.
So now you know the entire history of Spam. Oh, by the way, if you don’t believe me and look this up in Wikipedia, just remember that this may NOT be a reliable source of reference, (looks the other way).
Hey, after talking about this food, I’m hungry, anyone want a sandwich?