For those of you who have NOT already figured it out, and NO, I’m NOT talking about picking up ELEPHANT Poop,(Although that DOES sound disgusting too), I’m talking about the dreaded TOILET cleaning.
Of course, I usually put it off as LONG as possible and so when I DO clean it, DISGUSTING doesn’t even come close to the word to describe it. I know what you’re thinking, “But Sue, how can you NOT stand having a clean toilet?” My answer to that would be one simple Letter…the big “L”. For those of you who may NOT be familiar with the big “L”, it stands for LAZY!!!
Now, to clean MY toilet, you need the following tools:
Scalding Hot water
Plunger(Just in case)
Industrial strength Bleach
Necessary Building code permits
HEAVY DUTY RUBBER GLOVES
OK, I’ve put it off too long now, it’s time for the dirty deed to be handled. Boldly I go where NO man has gone before, into the depths of disgust and the chasms of YUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Forcefully I journey into the Jaws of HELL as I utilize the mask and gloves and dive into the abyss below. Being religious,(Yeah RIGHT), I have already said 4 Novenas and have chanted countless Brahman chants in the HOPES that I would come out of this ordeal ALIVE!!!
Finally, the moment of reckoning has arrived, I have begun my quest and I have conquered it. Of course, NOW it is time to undue the pain that this deplorable job has inflicted. I SPRINT to the liquor cabinet and immediately pour a healthy portion of Vodka in a glass and fill it with a “TOUCH” of Cranberry juice. I drink it down, have another, and THEN, I am feeling MUCH better about my accomplishment.
The DEED has been conquered, I am the VICTOR and I can go BACK to being the well mannered SLOB that I am…