Ahhhh…The annoying hiccup. We all get ‘em but some of us get them worse, and more frequently than others. So, what causes these annoying little air interruptions? It’s your diaphragm…Can YOU say diaphragm? Why the Hell do they have to put a G in there anyway? I mean, it’s pronounced Dia-a-fram. “Can I have the country of ORIGIN please?” Oh never mind, I came here to discuss hiccups.
Anyway…This diaphragm thingy USUALLY works well. Sometimes though, it gets Pissed Off and decides to wreak havoc with your lungs by sucking air into your throat SUDDENLY and in a jerky manor. Hence, when you breathe, all you get is the annoying hiccuppy sound.
Okay, enough history lesson, let’s get to the funny part, the WAY people hiccup. Ever notice how folks hiccup differently? Some sound like hic-UP and others like HIC-up. Listen to people hiccup, it’s hysterical. YES…I KNOW I’m weird. It runs in the family.
Babies hiccup REALLY fast like hiccup, hiccup, hiccup. Hey…Pay ATTENTION here…I’m talking. Older, (I mean more MATURE), folks have a tendency to hiccup longer than do younger folks. NO…I DIDN’T get this off the internet, I pay ATTENTION as people hiccup. What…YOU DON’T???
Anyway, the FUNNIEST thing (I think), about the hiccups is trying to CURE them. There are a myriad of ways people use to cure the hiccups, here are a few:
- 1. Watching someone hold their breath while counting to 500. THIS one ALWAYS works. Unfortunately, as the person gets to about 200, they usually either pass out or die. It DOES work though. DON’T TRY THIS AT HOME!!!
- 2. Drinking from the “WRONG” side of the glass??? WTF??? What IS the WRONG side of a glass anyway??? People swear by this one however.
- 3. Putting sugar under your tongue. OK, I DID look this one up but SERIOUSLY??? This sounds something that a WITCH DR. would do in the back hills of Botswana Land. Again though, people claim that it works.
- 4. My FAVORITE though, is using the old SCARE TECHNIQUE. I must be a SADIST at heart I guess. Nothing I like more than having someone jump out of somewhere unannounced, a machete in their hand threatening to obliterate the person with hiccups. OK, OK, I only DID it ONCE but it WORKED like a charm.
If YOU have any other fascinating ways to eliminate the hiccups I would LOVE to hear them. As for ME, I’m stickin’ with my old tried and true scare method. Thanks for listening folks.