Just Ask Sooz


Dear Sooz:

I am a 25 year old woman who has a serious problem. My boyfriend of three years has never once been intimate with me. Oh he will hold my hand, kiss me, and even feel my boobs, yet he has never once asked to well, you know, make love with me.

He is very sweet to me, buys me gifts, takes me to dinners and movies etc, but he never seems to want me. I have asked him about this and he says that he does love me and when the time is “right” he will do so. He is 31 and neither of us has ever been married.

I have normal sexual desires and urges Sooz, I really want to act on them but I just can’t seem to get him motivated. I am a reasonably attractive woman and I enjoy the closeness of our relationship but I want more, any suggestions?

Hot in Hawaii


Dear Hot in Hawaii:

OMG??? Are you freakin’ KIDDING me??? 3 YEARS??? Honey, I don’t know HOW the Sweet Dejesus you have EVER made it this long…By NOW, I would have F**KED everything from Animal, Mineral, or Vegetable, and STILL wanted more…

Are you sure he isn’t gay? Is he always impeccably dressed, does he hum show tunes, Love to shop, or say things like: “I just Luuuuuve your window treatments?” If he does ANY of these things, RUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN……!!! SERIOUSLY…3 YEARS???? WTF!!!

Baby doll, if he hasn’t moved Mr. Happy out of his pants and into a “warmer” environment in 3 years there is DEFINITELY something wrong with him. Get the HELL outta there before you get any older and shrivel your WHO HA up FOREVER. Seriously, there is something wrong here honey, break it off and find someone who not only loves you but gives your BODY the attention that it so desperately CRAVES… 3 YEARS??? SERIOUSLY??? Makes the sign of the cross over WHO HA area…Sometimes we just have to make the difficult decisions, THIS is one of them. Good luck…

2 thoughts on “Just Ask Sooz

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