Sooz’s New Year’s Resolutions

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I will drink NO more—Than I NEED to get good and shitfaced.

No more drunken phone calls or texts—Unless…They NEED to be made. (They USUALLY) DO…

No writing about my SAD and SCREWED UP family life past—Unless I feel it will bring me high into the BUZZING LIST.

I resolve NEVER to smart talk another Blogger here…Oh DAMN…I’ve already just broken that one. NEXT!!!!!!!

No more running around NUDE at my office Christmas Parties. Well…OK…UNLESS I am really drunk…I mean, how OFTEN could THAT happen???

No more demoralizing Threesomes…DAMN…There’s ANOTHER one already broken. I guess I am just not GOOD at this LIST thingy.

I will remain calm and always take the high road when angry…Unless someone REALLY pisses me off.

No more getting DRUNK in public…I’m going for at LEAST a week here on that one.

If I DO get drunk in public, I will NOT get into a confrontation with the Police like the LAST time.

I will NOT become the WEDDING SLUT ONCE this year…If you are having a wedding and wanna invite me…You have my SOLEMN promise on this one. (Fingers Crossed).

Phew…That feels a lot better. I’m sure with a LOT of self will and determination; I will complete at least ONE of these. Last year I didn’t fulfill any. *SAD FACE*

Until Later…

 

 

 

 

10 thoughts on “Sooz’s New Year’s Resolutions

  1. I imagine your failures are 100 times more interesting (and fun!) than most people’s successes. Good luck on the resolutions – sort of… 😉

    Like

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