Just Ask Sooz

Dear Sooz:
My name is Magie, I am 35, and I read your column religiously. My problem is, I am a very sexual person who would like to have my “hairless forest” cleaned by my husbands tongue. He is unfortunately a Germaphobe and will never satisfy me that way.
I have bathed, placed nice perfume down there, and even showed him articles where it won’t hurt him in any way, but, to no avail. Don’t get me wrong Sooz, the sex is very good, it’s just not what floats my boat the best, ya know?
I am at my wits end here and don’t know what else to do. Can you help me?
Needs Forest Cleaned

Dear Needs Forest Cleaned:
Alas, I am sorry for your dilemma. Many men have this phobia, it is very common. The only thing I could suggest is sex therapy, this may help to ease his fear of “catching” something, and enjoy that variety of sex more.
Try this, have a nice dinner, some wine, and then try and explain to him that while you are totally satisfied with his lovemaking, you would REALLY go crazy if he would just “Clean Your Clock”. I think once he tries it, you will have acquired a new variety of lovemaking.
I hope he will try it, because once he does, and he sees how you react to his touch, he will become a happy camper. Good luck.

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