Just Ask Sooz

Dear Sooz:

Thanks so much! It’s kind of lengthy but I could really use some input.

This guy (27) dated my older sister (24) for about 3 years. Last year, she came out as lesbian to everyone and they broke up but have remained close friends (and roommates). This year, him and I (22) had grown close, and he ended up telling me he was in love with me. I told him I loved him too.

I talked to my older sister about this and she said she was more than happy for us. So we tried it out for a couple weeks but I then realized I was in love with his personality but not physically attracted to him.

This ended in April. He and my younger sister start hanging talking quite often. I don’t think anything of it because we have all been friends since he began dating our oldest sister. Two weeks ago, we were all hanging out and he keeps flirting with my younger sister (18) talking all cutesy and trying to cuddle.

I held it together until my younger sister left then I told him I didn’t want to be friends with him anymore and I left. I don’t know why I feel so upset about all of this but it has been eating me at my core for the past two weeks.

I catch myself randomly thinking about it throughout the day and getting upset. I never stay mad for this long.. so I’m wondering, am I the only one that would be mad about this? Am I crazy?


Dear Anonymous:

It seems to me that your anger might be based on the fact that you once cared for him. My thoughts are that you were were OK with your older sister dating him because it went on for a long time.

Then, you became involved with him and eventhough you broke it off, you were still carrying some feelings for him. When he started becoming affectionate with your sister,, this stirred yur emotional flame and you became jealous. This is perfectly natural.

Let some time pass and you will feel much better, PLUS, with the age difference, it probably won’t last anyway. Good Luck…


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