The World According to Sooz

In this day and age, you would think that people would be MORE tolerant to sexual roles, race, and creed. Still, we all fight these terrible injustices, WHY???

Do we all not bleed with the stick of a knife, do we all not feel hurt feelings when called a racial remark, or accused of being less than a Human being if we are not all heterosexual?

Just yesterday, I was merely walking down the street with a girlfriend and someone shouted out lesbians. That, while the remark was ignorant, STILL it struck me to the core.

I thought, THAT person doesn’t KNOW me, he doesn’t know my life, WHAT gives him the right to slur me this way? The entire day sent me into a “fuzzy” zone and made me question the Human race.

While I understand that people are “brought up” to hate certain groups of people, I would have thought by NOW, people would have changed. After all, there are so many OTHER things to worry about these days, including the destruction of life as we KNOW it, so WHY the detrimental comments then?

Am I being too sensitive? I don’t think so. The truth is, I LOVE my fellow man, yes, even the misinformed primordial man from yesterday. In my heart of hearts, I wish that man as a species would GROW UP and become aware.

No more wars, shared food across the world, and the beneficial goal of HELPING live peacefully and happily for ALL nations. Medical care for all, and a shared love for each other regardless of our Creed, Color, or Sexual preferences.

Let us work together as enlightened beings to MAKE this end goal an accomplishment. In doing so, you will have shown YOUR strength in this difficult resolve. May we ALL as one people COME together towards this end.

Thank you for reading and listening to me. Bless you all…



New Years Resolutions

Well, it’s the new year again, time for those who make New Years Resolitions to start thinking about what you will change to make your life healthier and happier. Personally, I usually don’t make resolutions because usually I break them at 12:01AM on New Years Day.

This year, however, I have decided to make a few, JUST in case I might actually do a little changing. As unlikely as it seems, I actually MIGHT make a few changes. The following are MY resolutions:

  1. Stop Drinking—Yeah, like THAT is gonna happen. After 40 something years, I have had an off again, on again, love with alcohol. While I agree it would be beneficial for my health, I have always had a defeatist attitude towards this one. I WILL give it a try however, and if I fail, screw it, I will never make this one again.


  1. Get Healthy—Since I am already in tip top condition, I guess I will try to eat less. Hmmmm, maybe I will substitute WINE instead of food, oh no, wait, that goes against resolution number 1. Damn!!!


  1. Pick Up a Useful Skill or Hobby—I know, how about adding a six pack? I WAS talking about my Abbs, but now that I think about it, that DOES sound GOOD, (Licks lips sexily)


  1. Take a Trip—This year, I will plan a trip to Europe, I went last year and met the love of my life. I decided to release her because I felt she was encouraging me to continuing my alcoholism. I will look her up and see if I can get her back. If I become re-addicted to alcohol, it may be worth it to regain my forever love. Time will tell.


If you have made any resolutions, good for you. I wish you all the fortitude to stick with, and fulfill your goals. For all of you, may you see a successful and happy new year. Muah!!!















Speed Demon Sooz

When I was a young girl, I always thought I would grow up to be a Princess. However, in order to DO that, it required marrying a Prince. The problem was, there weren’t too many princes around my neighborhood.

Finally, with chin held high, I had to drop down to my second dream, becoming a race car driver. I always LOVED the sound of a Hemi when she was revving, the smell of the tires screeching out, as the neighborhood boys would continuiously do to impress us girls, and of course…”The Need for SPEED”.

Now, I KNOW what you’re thinking, “Sooz, THAT’S a BOY dream, you should have played with Barbies and done crafts”. Gag me with a spoon… Actually, I was a Tomboy, still am, and I have always wanted to drive a formula one race car.

Tomorrow, I get a chance to actualize THAT dream. A friend of mine who works at the track, called and invited me to come down, watch him drive, and then take over the reigns for a few trips around the track. I was soooo excited, I almost Orgasmed right there in my pants.

Just think of it, ME in a Formula One, Helmut on, Track Suit on, (Which by the way I will look Mah-vel-ous in), flying around the track. OMG, I almost CAME again. I can’t wait until tomorrow.

I will let all of you know about my experience once I complete the task. Wish me luck.   I am going to picture myself in an actual race, which OF COURSE, I will win. Hey, I can dream, can’t I?

Until tomorrow…



Christmas Past

Hi everyone. I hope your day is going as well as mine. I am curled up by the fireplace that I hardly ever use, with of course my favorite bottle of Vodka with cranberry.

I am actually a bit pensive today, just dreaming about some of my best Christmas experiences. I remember one Christmas Eve, I must have been about 5, our home was decorated to the nines, as my Daddy did so love Christmas, and the smell that came from our kitchen as Mom was making our Christmas dinner was AMAZING.

My dad was the most loving, and kind man on Earth. That year, he had called down to the City Mission, and invited all the homeless to visit US for a wonderful Christmas dinner.

Seriously, he did. One by one, there would be a knock at the door, and our home would quickly come alive with the wanton of our Society. Mom had prepared an amazing repast, Turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, green bean casseroles, freshly baked rolls, and of course a HUGE Figgy Pudding for dessert. OH MY!!!

I remember my daddy greeting the less fortunate at the door like they were all FAMILY, and he welcomed them ALL into our home. He would play Xmas songs on the piano while everyone would join in and sing. Good times.

People would eat and eat as my mom quickly replenished the food for everyone. Memories like this filled my soul full of joy, and they have transformed ME into a better Human being.

Oh sure, I still have my faults, but I ALWAYS remember the poor, and how happy they were, at least for a night when they regained their love for each other. To this day, I go to the mission, and invite the downtrodden for dinner. They are indeed the TRUE meaning of Christmas.

Sorry, I seemed to have rambled on a bit here, I do that after tipping a few pops. I sincerely hope you have enjoyed my Christmas past, and I urge you all to at least say a prayer this Holiday Season for those who are less fortunate than you. Believe me, you will be blessed 7 Times 7.

Good night, Happy Hanukkah, a very Merry Xmas to all.




Holiday Cheer

Today is Wednesday, only five more days until Xmas and I have everything in order. Yup, tree up, decorations done, Christmas cookies done, bottle in hand and all is RIGHT with the world.

I hope all of you are celebrating the Holidays with your loved ones, and that each and every one of you is filled with Holiday Peace and Happiness. I love this time of year, we all come together as one, and spread love and harmony throughout the world.

 Sure, I’m inebriated, but none the less, I meant what I said. Each and every one of you are like family to me. You pick me up when I’m down, and you share in all my joys. Do you know what the best thing I love about all of you is though, you never JUDGE me. I am who I am, and STILL, you continue to read me. God Bless You!!!

So, to ALL of you who read me, and especially to those who comment on what I write, May I wish you the Happiest of Holidays, and may you continue to prosper now, and throughout your years.

All my Best…


The Great Light Fight Debate

Hi everyone. If you’re like me, you are enjoying all the joys of the Holiday season. If NOT, what’s your problem Mr. Grinch? Anyway, I came here today because I’ve been watching The Great Light Fight on Television.

For those of you who either live in a closet, or, don’t watch TV, it’s a show about who can decorate their houses the most gaudy, and fill up their ENTIRE property line full of lights, blow up figures, and mind boggling displays to music.

People who are expert judges, (Celebrities), come to see which house can make their electric meter move the fastest for the longest length of time. If you are declared the winner, you get 50,000 dollars AND, the best part, a Christmas Ornament that lights up with the old style Christmas bulbs.

My question…WHY??? Look, I am all for lighting your home for the Holidays, BUT, some of these people start in October to have their display done for Xmas. Again…WHY???

Some of the participants have as many as 2 acres to light, and by golly, they DO. I don’t know how you guys feel about this, but I just think it is Cray Cray. I mean, WHO has TIME to do all of this work? Fifty foot lit Xmas trees, merry go rounds, Ferris Wheels, and a Santa’s Workshop, (All home made), with the REAL SANTA working inside. OK, I MAY have lied about the real Santa, but, everything else was true.

Are they nice? Yes, but in my opinion, they lean towards the GAUDY. I mean WHO NEEDS all of that? Is it worth it for 50K and a 12.00 dollar trophy ornament? Not to me. So, that begs the question, why do people go through all this effort for such a SHORT period of time?

On TV, it’s because they are carrying on the work of their parents, or their wife who just passed. Is this for REAL, or is it just good Television? I’ll let you folks decide. Write me and let me know what YOU think. In the mean time, I guess I better go out and buy a few more lights.

Until Later…



Naughty or Nice

Bless me WordPress for I have sinned. I went shopping today with a buzz on and did the following:

  1. I yelled at 3 people that tried to buy something I wanted when there was only ONE item of each left. They called me a drunken Biatch, but, I still wound up with the items I wanted so THERE F**k heads. 
  1. I waited in line to see Santa and gave him a Lap Dance…What??? Hey, Not my fault, I was buzzed. I must say though, Santa had a BIG present for me, and I liked it. I tried to get his number for later, but he said he was married so I thought better of calling him. 
  1. I gave the Salvation Army Santa a hundred dollar bill, and when I asked if it was OK to feel his ass, he agreed. See, money CAN buy you SOME things. Man, I LOVE ASSES. 
  1. I stopped at a couple of bars for some Xmas cheer, and I must admit, I was VERY cheerful when I left. I had kissed at least 3 patrons, including the female bartender. Will I burn in Hell??? 
  1. I got home, staggered in the door, fell to the floor, and decided I might just as well Masturbate while I was there, I was very HORNY!!! 
  1. After the deed was done, I crawled to my bar, grabbed a bottle of Vodka and drank it till I passed out. I just woke up now. I am somewhat sober still, BUT, I can surely fix that. 

OK, how many prayers am I going to have to say to FIX all of that, 10, 50, 100, WHAT??? That was MY day folks, I hope YOURS went a lot more smoothly. Until next time…

P.S.—In case you were wondering, I have a driver that takes me around. I do NOT Drink and Drive!!!







A Line From Sooz

Image result for sexy woman in christmas garb

Tonight brings me to THINKING about the Holiday season.. It’s Christmas, a time when all people are supposed to be relaxed, happy, and joyful. BS I say!!!

If we’re honest with ourselves, (I’m speaking mostly to the women here), it’s the busiest, most stressful, aggravating time of the year.

No offense guys, but, usually it’s us women who write the cards, buy all the gifts, wrap them, bake the cookies, do the cooking, and ten thousand OTHER things during this “Happy and Fun” time of the year.

Christmas is SUPPOSED to be a peaceful time, honoring the birth of Christ, NOT seeing who has the best price for Aunt Irma’s gloves. God bless all you women who get it all done and STILL have a great attitude, you ought to get a medal.

I must admit, I am NOT one of you. As much as I enjoy the holiday, it’s a time of year I go off the deep end just a little bit. DON’T get me wrong, I am NOT a raving maniac the rest of the year, just around Xmas.

I’ve been known to push and shove people in the stores, and once, I got so mad, I tipped over the store Xmas tree at a major chain store. Sure, I had had a few, “pops” before I went out, but STILL, when they say they have an item, dammit, HAVE THE ITEM.

Luckily, the judge let me off with just a huge fine, and told me never to go to that store again, I HAVEN’T. You see my point though, right? No Ho- Ho- Ho there, just a hangover the next day and a little more stress added to my Holiday fun.

Everybody, do me a favor, be a dear this Christmas. If you are married, have a significant other, or perhaps EVEN your Mom, treat them with respect, and thank the living dickens out of them for making your Christmas go off without a hitch.

Then, you can write me, and thank me for being, and writing a BITCH letter. Merry Christmas to ALL…Cheers!!!


Writing While Drunk

Image result for drunk woman writing

Hi there everyone, my name is Sooz and I’m a drunk. Yup, that’s right, I guess I should say I am a recovering alcoholic, however, today, I am NOT so recovered. I am indeed drunk as a skunk.

Now, what does this mean, nothing really, you see, I used to be drunk most of the time and would sit down and write until I couldn’t see straight anymore. It’s just been a while since I’ve been drunk, so this morning, I got up, poured myself a couple of shots and then downed it with some wine. Yuuuum, what a great breakfast.

I have continued through the afternoon, so I am quite blottoed right about now. I just thought I would share that with you. God, I feel good, I think I’m going to call my cute hunky neighbor next door and see if he would like to come over for a quickie.

That’s one thing about me, when I’m sober, I have a voracious sexual appetite, but, when I’m drunk, I have an INSATIABLE sexual HUNGER. I NEED SEX and I need it NOW. Excuse me for a moment while I make that call.

I’m back, he answered and he immediately KNEW I was drunk. He said he would be over in an hour, I hope it isn’t too much longer than that as I am nearing a critical point here in my drunkenness.

So, how is everybody here doing on this WONDRFUL Saturday? Anyone else drunk today? Don’t worry folks, I will be straight as an arrow tomorrow, I just wanted to remember how I used to feel when the alcohol drifts through my system like a fast flowing river, and takes complete control of my mind and body. AMAZING!!!

I know, I shouldn’t say that being an alcoholic, but I can’t help it. Well, here’s looking at you all. I love each and every one of ya. Cheers!!!!


A Letter to God

Image result for god

Dear Omnipotent Spirit:

It has come to my attention, the world is going to Hell in a hand basket. With all the rhetoric regarding nuclear war, the killing of innocent victims, suicide bombings, and the resurgence of war talk everywhere, I have come to You for help.

The world you created was one in which man should have worshipped you, and lived in peace and harmony forever. The only flaw as I see it was your giving us “free will”. Because we are a flawed race, it became easy for the forces of evil to seep into our nature and lead us astray.

That being said, it appears that the evil in the world has taken over, and that decent folks are doing everything they can to muddle through. While I believe that there IS some good in everyone, it appears the lines from Julius Ceasar, spoken by Marc Anthony at Ceasar’s funeral were correct: “The evil that men do lives after them; the good is oft interred with their bones”.

I sincerely ask, with the help of your grace, the leaders of the world will realize that nuclear war is just a waste for ALL sides. No one wins. Every other option is moot. Let us put down our arms and convert them to plowshares.

Guide us, and bring us ALL back into your fold. Peace and tranquility for all, and a sharing of ALL our resources to help those who have less. Wouldn’t this be a better way to live?

Thanks for listening.

Your devoted servant,