Just Ask Sooz

 

drunk-redhead-girl

Dear Sooz:

I am writing this while I am drunk. My boyfriend of 3 years has just left me. He claims I am a bad girlfriend and that I only want to have sex with him when I’m drunk.

While that is true Sooz, when we were together, I usually was drunk at which point I would have sex with him.

It’s just something within me that feels better having sex when I am relaxed and confident. What’s wrong with having sex that way anyway?

I don’t know what’s wrong with me Sooz, right now, I just wanna fuck the world. Any thoughts?

Broken Hearted Drunk

 

Dear Broken Hearted Drunk:

I have addressed this before, several women like to have a drink or two before making love. The kicker, as I see it, is he didn’t like you being drunk. Were you a slobbering drunk, or just “relaxed”?

It sounds to me as if you may have been a slobbering drunk. If that was the case, you have more than a boyfriend problem, you MAY have a drinking problem.

I would recommend you see a Dr. about this who could advise you of a program near you. There will always be other boyfriends, first get yourself straight, THEN you may be able to keep a boyfriend next time.

Good Luck.

 

Just Ask Sooz

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Dear Sooz:

I read your blog about being bitten by a flea, and I laughed my ass off. I thought I would write and tell you what happened to me, as I thought you would enjoy it. It all started when I was a child about the age of 12.

My Family and I went old style camping, you know, no inside toilets or any real amenities. My brother and I were in the woods, hiking, and we both had stepped in a grass covered depression in the ground. It turned out, that depression was a bees nest.

The next thing you know, it seemed as though there were 1000 honey bees flying around us and stinging us all over. We hauled our asses out of there asap and ran faster than an Olympian sprinter back to our cabin.

When we got back, whimpering like little girls, my mother lovingly, (Yet secretly enjoying this), pulled out the stingers still stuck in my cute little ass. Each stinger pulled, cut my chances of becoming a professional equestrian. I could just see myself bouncing up and down in the saddle yelling ouch with each and every bounce.

I’ll never forget that day, and after reading your story, it brought back all those beautiful, yet painful memories. Thanks for the memories Sooz.

Sore Ass

 

Dear Sore Ass:

While my flea bite was very uncomfortable, I believe you’ve got me beat. Thanks for the input, it was fun and amusing.

 

 

Just Ask Sooz

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Dear Sooz:

Hi there Sooz, not really sure how to open here. I read your Ask Sooz all the time, and it has come to be that now I have a problem. My name is Muriel and I am a 26 year old woman. My husband of 5 years, let’s call him Jack, is a very good person except for one thing, he has an explosive temper.

I had seen glimpses of it before we were married, but recently he has accelerated the number of incidents. There doesn’t seem to be any real explanation for them and I am quite concerned for my 4 year old and myself.

I have asked him what is wrong on several occasions, and he merely dismisses me saying that it is in my mind. I have tried to have him go to a counselor, but he is too macho and won’t do it.

I am afraid and don’t know what my next move should be, can you help us?

Fearful Wife

 

Dear Fearful Wife:

Your husband may be exhibiting signs of an abusive husband. You didn’t mention in your letter if he has hit you or your child. Is there anything at work that is bothering him, (Not that that is an excuse to abuse you), or anything else in his life that could have brought on this behavior?

My concern is for you and your child. If he experiences this abusive behavior again, take your child and leave for a shelter. He may very well have grown up in an abusive family, and IF so, the same abusive behavior may have carried over to him.

He NEEDS to seek counseling, no ands, ifs, or buts about it. Treatment can help but HE needs to be willing to go and seek help. Remember, stay safe, if this continues, he could be a spouse batterer. Please let me know if this goes on any further.

 

 

 

Just Ask Sooz

 

Dear Sooz:

I am a 24 year old woman who really enjoys sex. My husband and I were married 4 years ago and we used to make love all the time, I mean twice to three times a day. Recently, he has waned to only once per week.

I have asked him if he isn’t feeling well or if something has happened down there, and he just says that he has been tired as of late. He has been working a lot lately, even sometimes into the night.

Do you think he could be secretly having an affair? I am so distraught, please help me.

Sexy Blond

 

Dear Sexy Blond:

First of all, I am not a mind reader and couldn’t tell you if your husband is having an affair. Look for the telltale signs, credit card receipts, him or his clothing smelling like perfume that is NOT yours, continued working late at night, and of course his underwear smelling of “HER”.

Give him the benefit of the doubt, after only 4 years of being married, unless he was a player before, more than likely he IS tired. If this goes on however, you may want to do some spying on your own of hire a PI to investigate. Good luck…

 

Just Ask Sooz

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Dear Sooz:

I’d like to voice my opinion in your column if it’s OK? You see, I am married to a man who is 18 years my junior. I know, everyone calls me a cougar, but I must tell you, the marriage has worked fine now for over 15 years.

I am 56 and he is 38. We met doing laundry one day when he was only 23, I was 41 at the time. When people see us holding hands or kissing, they call us sick. Usually, they describe me as robbing the cradle, but I am here to tell you that we are both very much in love.

I have always liked older men, and I must say, I consider myself a very young looking 56. Even though the’re others out there who criticize us, we are both glad we decided to get married and become lifelong partners.

I just wanted those out there who would consider me someone taking advantage of a younger man wrong. Thank you for letting me air my voice in your forum.

P.S. The sex is amazing.

Just Ask Sooz

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Dear Sooz:

I could really use your help. My parents are from India and are very old school when it comes to getting married. My parents believe in arranged marriages, and have already made an arranged marriage for me.

I am really in a pickle here because I am already in a serious relationship. Not only are my parents against him, he is also outside of my race. I am so confused.

If I continue my relationship with my boyfriend, I may very well lose the respect and love of my parents. If I go through with the arranged marriage,

I will be doing myself a disservice and my heart will be broken. I am really torn Sooz, what shall I do?

Torn Soul

 

Dear Torn Soul:

This is America baby, everyone is entitled to choose who THEY want, NOT your parents. While I realize that this is a very old tradition in your Indian culture, you must discuss this with your parents and make them see it YOUR way.

Let them know that you love them, but your happiness should NOT be IMPOSED upon you. I believe your parents will see your side of this, if NOT, they are still your parents and will eventually get over it.

This is your life and should live it accordingly. Good Luck…

 

 

Just Ask Sooz

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Just Ask Sooz

Dear Sooz:

I have a question I would like you to answer. My father owns a motel and he and I have a different opinion about something. I am 21 and sometimes I like to have my boyfriends come over and stay with me in my room at the motel.

My father says that it is “his” motel, and that I should be paying to have a sleep over just like anybody else. I, on the other hand, believe that since it is “my” room, I should be able to do what I want to free of charge.

What do you think? I really want your input.

Motel Prisoner

 

Dear Motel Prisoner:

While I understand your thoughts on this, I must agree with your father on this one. Since he IS the owner of the motel where you reside, in essence, it is HIS house and you should abide by his rules.

Perhaps you could ask him for a discount when you bring male friends over for a “visit”, just a thought. Good luck…

 

 

 

 

Just Ask Sooz

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Dear Sooz:

I read your column all the time and I was hoping you could answer a question for me. You see, my wife and I have a terrific sex life, but, she has to be dead drunk in order to achieve orgasm.

I love my wife, we’ve been married 15 years, but I would like to have sober sex with her. The problem has been every time we have tried it sober, she never comes to orgasm. Give her a bottle and a half or two of wine however, and she becomes a sexual goddess. The funny part is, she usually doesn’t get drunk anyother time.

I guess I am glad that she “wants” to have sex and orgasm with me enough to get drunk, I just wish there was something I could say or do to help her overcome her inhibitions towards sex while sober.

I understand you are an alcoholic who also enjoys having sex while drunk. What’s the thought process behind this? Plese help me if you can.

Concerned Husband

 

Dear Concerned Husband:

To pin point this is difficult as there are a number of reasons for this. One, it MIGHT depend on how she grew up and her parents attitudes about sex, or, she may feel uncomfortable about sex in general where as the alcohol takes those inhibitions away.

She might just have a low libido, many women do. Sometime testosterone drug therapy helps these women. What I would suggest is to have her see her Dr. if possible and see what he or she says about this.

The Dr. may reccomend a specialist who may be able to help and hopefully you can return to a “normal” sex life. I must tell you though, for ME, I still like to be drunk when engaging in sex.

I sincerely hope that she goes to the Dr. and explains her perticulars. Good luck with this.

Just Ask Sooz

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Dear Sooz:

Here is my question. Recently, I learned to play the clarinet. Though I have played many instruments, this one was a bit more of a challenge in some ways.

I have played piano in front of large audiences in the past, but, for some reason, when I try to play clarinet for a couple friends it mostly comes out as squeaks and squeals.

My two friends, Pat and Bob, are very supportive, in fact, too supportive at times, but my feelings of inadequacy are starting to affect my musical confidence.

 I am a mess about this because playing the clarinet in the symphony has always been a dream of mine, and one that I can pursue now that I am over my lip balm addiction. What should I do about this? I fear auditioning in front of my peers and looking a fool. Thank you.

 Blowing In The Wind

 

Dear Blowing in the Wind:

A musical instrument is like giving a BJ, practice makes perfect. The more you practice, the better you will get. Good luck.

Just Ask Sooz

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Dear Sooz:

For a while now, I have wondered how broken you have be before you’re too far gone to be saved. I used to think I was too far gone, but then an old friend came back into my life we’ll call him guy x,  and he showed me that I could be loved.

I started to fall for him, but he was stuck between me and another girl. For a while, he flirted with both of us and said he didn’t know which of us to choose. At first, we overlooked it because, well, he was a guy and you know how guys can be.

After I became friends with the other girl, and realized how great of a person she was, that’s when I realized how much pain it was really causing us. At first, I didn’t notice my pain, but when I did,  I pushed it back inside.

I knew I needed to do something for myself, but it still shattered my heart. Now, I am starting to get to be friends with this other guy, we’ll call guy m. I told guy x that we should just go back to being just friends because the other way was causing too much pain.

The other girl introduced me to guy m, and we are still getting to know each other. He is very kind, and funny, and I think I’m starting to like him. Here’s the thing, he likes me, but I’m afraid… What if I fall for him and get hurt, or, what if I’m not good enough? What if he deserves better? What should I do Sooz?

Broken Girl 18

 

Dear Broken Girl 18:

Here is what I have learned through many relationships in life. “Nothing ventured, nothing gained” Life is a crapshoot my dear, being only 18, you will probably get your heart broken several more times before finding Mr. Right.

Don’t let the bad taste of one bad apple sour you on the other apples in the tree. You deserve to be happy, take a chance, fall in love, lust, and have some fun. If it works out, great, if it doesn’t, well,  move on and go to the next man.

Take a chance with guy M and be happy while you can. Good luck.