Once Upon a Lifetime


It’s Sunday; and here I sit with my PJ’S on, drinking coffee, reading the paper, and just contemplating my life. No, SERIOUSLY, I AM!!! I have come to realize that I have overcome many obstacles in my life up to this point.

Like many of you, I have come through some serious adversities, Self inflicted mortal gunshot wound of my father, alcoholic mother, being BiSexual, and all the things that come WITH all that baggage growing up.

HOW the HELL did I DO it??? Oh yeah, through the abuse of alcohol…That’s the ticket. Yeah, since I was very young, I abused alcohol, and used it as my crutch to cope with the world around me.

I have been a drunk ever since I was in middle school. WOW!!! When you’re that young, the only thing you realize is the hangover the next day. Of course, the MORE I drank, the more hangovers occurred. You’d have thought that I had a PROBLEM back then, but, the alcohol helped with sociability, sex, and of course the constant pain I drug around from loneliness.

I think the hardest thing in my life was overcoming my alcohol addiction after so many years. It had become my friend, my constant companion, and luckily, I was able to buy my dependent drug whenever I needed it.

Looking back, I wish I had never taken that first drink. Do I miss it today, HELL YES!!! Have I been good, well, pretty good, I HAVE had a couple of slip ups, but then right back to the program?

I am VERY proud of myself for kicking AND living with this long time crutch. One of the things I regret, however, is what my liver probably looks like after years of all that abusive drinking. I can probably bounce quarters off it, like my ASS. Hehehehehehe.

All in all though, I have had a very successful life considering all that I have been through. OK, that’s enough of self-introspection, back to the paper… Thanks for listening…

Until Later…





If You Were a Grape That Becomes a Raisin: Describe how it feels to shrink, to Shrivel, and Become Dry and Wrinkled.

I offer this up because I felt it displayed for those of you who like to be creative, an outlet to express yourself. Below is MY take on the above subject. Please feel free to join me, and then send me a link to your rendition so I can read it.

There I was, just sitting on the counter in the sunshine, layin’ out, and enjoying the day. Living the grape life is a good one. Hanging on the vines until you are plump and ready, then, picked and packaged, and sold in a grocery store where someone can choose to purchase, and ultimately eat you.

Hmmmmm…The problem is, I have been here so long I am starting to get dry. “I am soooooo thirsty”. “ I feel as if I am shrinking a bit, and even starting to get shriveled up. “My oh my…Please, get me some water…” “Someone please HELP me.”

“What’s going on here, I’m starting to turn colors.” I KNEW it; they are deliberately turning me into a raisin.” More and more shriveled I get, getting smaller and smaller.

“I’m a GRAPE dammit; I didn’t ASK to become a raisin. Why are you DOING this to me?” “Now what’s happening, they’re pulling me off and pouring me a box.” Owwwww, now I’m being sprinkled with honey and sugar, I wonder if I am in a package of cereal, I LIKE cereal.”

“I AM….I AM…I am in Raisin Bran. YEA!!!!!!!” OK then, all my trials and tribulations were for nothing, once again, I am a happy camper…