Just Ask Sooz

Before I begin my Dear Sooz column, I must admit THIS letter really hit home. It made me more determined than ever to go and try to repair the damage I have done to my ex, Bella. It was actually painful for me to write a response, yet, ALL letters must be answered. I share this now with all of you.

Dear Sooz:

I, like you, have just lost the absolute love of my life. My boyfriends name was Johnn he was the best thing that ever happened to me. Like you Sooz, I met him abroad, he worked in a café in France as a waiter while I was visiting on Holiday.

I was hungry and wanted to sit and take in all the ambiance of the city, so, I decided to go to a nice café and get something to eat. Sooz, it was love at first sight, he asked me what I wanted with the sexiest French accent and I just melted.

When he returned with my meal, he noticed I was looking right through him, he commented how the sun paled in its beauty next to me. That was all she wrote, I blushed, got wet, and luckily, he asked me out.

We went out, walked along the Seine, held hands, and I instantly fell in love. He was loving, tender, and had such a deep strong voice, I felt almost slave like when he placed his glorious mouth on mine.

We dated for six months before that awful day. Johnn had asked me to marry him, and of course I said yes. I was never happier Sooz. We settled into a small apartment and things were going great until that one morning in June.

Birds were singing, and the usual sounds of hustle and bustle of the day filled the streets like music fills your ears. He had gone out early that day to surprise me with croissants and coffee before I got up.

 According to witness accounts, as he went to turn the corner to the local bakery, a car jumped the curb striking and killing my Johnn. I learned of the tragedy from a knock at my door. Two gendarmes appeared there to break the news, and as they did, I collapsed in their arms. My world ended that fateful day. I have cried at least once a day thinking of our beautiful love.

 Broken, I returned home to America and have tried to get on with my life, but, to no avail. I miss him, and shall never forget what we once rejoiced. My suggestion Sooz, get on that plane now, find Bella, and do whatever it takes to get her back. Life indeed is way too short to miss a life changing opportunity.

Molly

 

Dear Molly:

Tears fell like rain as I read your letter. What you had, seemed like the “REAL DEAL”. I THANK YOU for your letter, I am sorry for your loss, and I promise you, I WILL seek to regain the love I so quickly dismissed, God Bless You.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Just Ask Sooz

Dear Sooz:

I am a 25 year old woman who reads your column all the time. My problem is, for two years I have been going out with my boyfriend, he has been attentive, thoughtful, and is a great lover. Recently, he has been distant. I can’t put my finger on it, although recently, he has been a lot less interested in sex.

I enjoy making love with him and when he refuses me, it makes me feel unloved. This has been going on for about a month now. I don’t know how to address this without him getting angry, and or him just ignoring it.

If you could give me some insight I would really appreciate it.

Confused

 

Dear Confused:

While I have my suspicions, my guess would be he is seeing someone else. Ask him right out about why your lovemaking has diminished.

If he doesn’t have a great reason, then I would start looking for the tell tale signs; his phone, credit card receipts, him being on the internet more than usual,  secret phone calls, or late nights at work.

Sorry babe, this is how I see it. I HOPE I am wrong, but, more than likely I am NOT. Good luck and here’s hoping I’m wrong.

 

 

 

Just Ask Sooz-Drunk Edition

Image result for very lonely drunk woman

Hello???

Hi there folks…I’m back. Just got my tits pampered, and my pussy satisfied, so once again I am ready, willing, and eager to write. P.S. I am wearing only a pink thong, that’s IT!!! Just wanted to give you guys and gals a visual image, wink.

OK, let’s get serious here for a moment and do a Just Ask Sooz segment. Here goes, oh, and YES, In case you were wondering, I’m still loaded. I picked this letter because it really hits home.

Dear Sooz:

I am a card carrying, drink every day, get passed out drunk. I am writing to you because I understand that at one time before your rehab, you have also been a lot like me and get passed out drunk at night.

I am a 35 year old woman, who drinks every morning, at lunch, and gets passed out drunk at night. I also don’t remember things that I did from day to day. While I realize that I need help Sooz, I also don’t want to take that first step. You see, I enjoy being drunk, just not the hangovers and sickness that comes along with it.

I don’t need to work as I inherited a huge trust fund from my parents, who died in an auto accident. I really have no reason to be sober except to try and become involved with someone. You see, I have had many one night stands, but never anything meaningful. I am lonely Sooz. Thank goodness I am drunk now as I wouldn’t have been able to pour my soul out if sober.

I identify with you Sooz, any suggestions?

Drunk Again

 

Dear Drunk Again:

This is a very hard one for me, because as I write this, I too have fallen off the wagon, and as you say, am “card carrying drunk”. I UNDERSTAND, and can tell you all the evil things about getting drunk, STD’s, broken relationships, health issues, etc.

What I heard in your letter was that you were NOT yet ready to take that first step in helping yourself. Until you truly commit, nothing will help you. You will go on being a subject to that bottle of booze.

I got clean because it started to affect me on a daily basis. Rehab was a bitch and YES, I crave it still every day, today was just one of those days. Am I glad I did it, YES, will I do it again, probably, but then it is a day to day struggle.

Am I glad I went to rehab and got “clean”, YES!!! Do I still enjoy getting drunk, YES, but living a clean, sober life ALSO has its benefits. I would give it a try, what do you have to lose except the hangovers and the blackouts?

I will hive you my number if you ever wanna talk. I wish you much success. Good Luck.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Just Ask Sooz

Image result for sexy lap dances

Dear Sooz:

I realize this sounds stupid coming from a 25 year old woman, but, none the less I would like your opinion. The other night, my boyfriend and I went to a club and came home a little drunk.

We were on my couch with just our tops and underwear on. I was on his lap pretending to give him a lap dance, when all of a sudden, he ejaculated. My question here is this, my panties got wet when he ejaculated and so did my Vagina.

Is it possible for his semen to have penetrated me, and do I have to look forward to a possible pregnancy? Some of friends tell me yes while others say no. I am currently one week overdue and I am in a frazzle right now. Just so you have all the facts, this is the first time any type of sex where ejaculate has occurred.

Feeling Down

 

Dear Feeling Down:

Good news my friend, unless he delivered a load of oh, let’s say a DUMP TRUCK full onto your panties, the “odds are in your favor”. You are about 99.999% guaranteed NOT to have gotten pregnant.

Semen going through clothes, then entering the Vagina and travelling up the Cervix, is just about impossible. You are probably overdue because of your angst. Sit back, CLOSE your legs, and keep your feet up. You dodged a bullet.

Since your boyfriend has experienced sexual climax with you, it might be a good idea to be a little more careful next time, unless of course you WANT to have sex. Good luck to you and Happy Holidays.

 

Just Ask Sooz

Image result for sad girl with wine

Dear Sooz:

Yesterday, my boyfriend of 4 years, out of the blue told me we were through. My mouth just dropped open, and I asked him why? He claimed he was bored with our relationship, and that he wanted to date other people.

Never before had he mentioned that he was bored, or that he wanted to date someone else. I am so upset. Are all men like this? Don’t they know when they have a good thing going? Our sex life has always been robust and I have never had any complaints.

I am just so broken up and pissed at men, I don’t care if I ever date again.

Sad Sac

 

Dear Sad Sac:

Relationships are hard, you really have to work on them to keep them fresh. It is hard for me to believe you have dated, and slept together for 4 years, and you have not noticed ANY change in him at all.

My guess, he just wasn’t ready for a committed relationship and wanted to move on to greener pastures.

Men aren’t ALL assholes honey, many are very very nice. Sooner or later someone WILL come around who is kind, considerate, and READY for a commitment.

Hang in there kiddo, YOUR time is coming. Sorry you had to be hurt, however, to learn this bitter lesson. Good Luck…

Just Ask Sooz

 

drunk-redhead-girl

Dear Sooz:

I am writing this while I am drunk. My boyfriend of 3 years has just left me. He claims I am a bad girlfriend and that I only want to have sex with him when I’m drunk.

While that is true Sooz, when we were together, I usually was drunk at which point I would have sex with him.

It’s just something within me that feels better having sex when I am relaxed and confident. What’s wrong with having sex that way anyway?

I don’t know what’s wrong with me Sooz, right now, I just wanna fuck the world. Any thoughts?

Broken Hearted Drunk

 

Dear Broken Hearted Drunk:

I have addressed this before, several women like to have a drink or two before making love. The kicker, as I see it, is he didn’t like you being drunk. Were you a slobbering drunk, or just “relaxed”?

It sounds to me as if you may have been a slobbering drunk. If that was the case, you have more than a boyfriend problem, you MAY have a drinking problem.

I would recommend you see a Dr. about this who could advise you of a program near you. There will always be other boyfriends, first get yourself straight, THEN you may be able to keep a boyfriend next time.

Good Luck.

 

Sex, Masturbation and Master Slave

 

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Dear Internet

 I use you each and every day and I don’t understand why you give me prompts for writing that suggest- Sex, Master Slave, and Masturbation. Yes, while it is true that I occasionally talk about Sex and Masturbation, I hardly EVER discusses my Master Slave proclivities.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t MIND talking about Master slave situations, it’s just that I don’t write about it that often to have my writing suggestions use this subject. I would much rather have my suggestions include Just Ask Sooz, or perhaps Sooz’s Fractured Fairy Tales.

Hell, even those stories about getting drunk or having drunken sex would be better. Preferably, the best suggestions would be about-Rainbows, Unicorns, and World Peace. OK, look, I would probably sprinkle these subjects with Sex, Masturbation, and perhaps Master Slave proclivities, BUT, I would much rather see the above in print as suggestions.

 I am finished bitching now, I realize you are just doing your due diligence when it comes to offering suggestions for all your writers. I promise to play nice from now on and will just take your suggestions as written. I humbly apologize for being a sexy depraved woman, who loves engaging in continuous masturbation, and will write more about my sexual Master Slave occurrences to live up to my suggestive matter.

 

Regards,

Sooz

P.S. My hands are in my pants as we speak… FU!!!!

 

 

 

Just Ask Sooz

Image result for cartoon of a 12 year old girl being stung on the ass by bees

Dear Sooz:

I read your blog about being bitten by a flea, and I laughed my ass off. I thought I would write and tell you what happened to me, as I thought you would enjoy it. It all started when I was a child about the age of 12.

My Family and I went old style camping, you know, no inside toilets or any real amenities. My brother and I were in the woods, hiking, and we both had stepped in a grass covered depression in the ground. It turned out, that depression was a bees nest.

The next thing you know, it seemed as though there were 1000 honey bees flying around us and stinging us all over. We hauled our asses out of there asap and ran faster than an Olympian sprinter back to our cabin.

When we got back, whimpering like little girls, my mother lovingly, (Yet secretly enjoying this), pulled out the stingers still stuck in my cute little ass. Each stinger pulled, cut my chances of becoming a professional equestrian. I could just see myself bouncing up and down in the saddle yelling ouch with each and every bounce.

I’ll never forget that day, and after reading your story, it brought back all those beautiful, yet painful memories. Thanks for the memories Sooz.

Sore Ass

 

Dear Sore Ass:

While my flea bite was very uncomfortable, I believe you’ve got me beat. Thanks for the input, it was fun and amusing.

 

 

Just Ask Sooz

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Dear Sooz:

Hi there Sooz, not really sure how to open here. I read your Ask Sooz all the time, and it has come to be that now I have a problem. My name is Muriel and I am a 26 year old woman. My husband of 5 years, let’s call him Jack, is a very good person except for one thing, he has an explosive temper.

I had seen glimpses of it before we were married, but recently he has accelerated the number of incidents. There doesn’t seem to be any real explanation for them and I am quite concerned for my 4 year old and myself.

I have asked him what is wrong on several occasions, and he merely dismisses me saying that it is in my mind. I have tried to have him go to a counselor, but he is too macho and won’t do it.

I am afraid and don’t know what my next move should be, can you help us?

Fearful Wife

 

Dear Fearful Wife:

Your husband may be exhibiting signs of an abusive husband. You didn’t mention in your letter if he has hit you or your child. Is there anything at work that is bothering him, (Not that that is an excuse to abuse you), or anything else in his life that could have brought on this behavior?

My concern is for you and your child. If he experiences this abusive behavior again, take your child and leave for a shelter. He may very well have grown up in an abusive family, and IF so, the same abusive behavior may have carried over to him.

He NEEDS to seek counseling, no ands, ifs, or buts about it. Treatment can help but HE needs to be willing to go and seek help. Remember, stay safe, if this continues, he could be a spouse batterer. Please let me know if this goes on any further.

 

 

 

Just Ask Sooz

 

Dear Sooz:

I am a 24 year old woman who really enjoys sex. My husband and I were married 4 years ago and we used to make love all the time, I mean twice to three times a day. Recently, he has waned to only once per week.

I have asked him if he isn’t feeling well or if something has happened down there, and he just says that he has been tired as of late. He has been working a lot lately, even sometimes into the night.

Do you think he could be secretly having an affair? I am so distraught, please help me.

Sexy Blond

 

Dear Sexy Blond:

First of all, I am not a mind reader and couldn’t tell you if your husband is having an affair. Look for the telltale signs, credit card receipts, him or his clothing smelling like perfume that is NOT yours, continued working late at night, and of course his underwear smelling of “HER”.

Give him the benefit of the doubt, after only 4 years of being married, unless he was a player before, more than likely he IS tired. If this goes on however, you may want to do some spying on your own of hire a PI to investigate. Good luck…