Portrait of a Lover

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Drunk… As I write this, I am fully tipsy. Oh doth the pain trouble my aching heart. My soul is ripped, and I suffer the unending arrows of love, shot through my inebriated shell of a body.

Bella is gone; she has fled back to France without a word of comfort, only saying she could no longer live the life of opulence and splendor. WHAT??? My swollen eyes morn for her return, yet my mind reveals the truth.

I believed we were a match made in Heaven, a symbiotic relationship joined through love and admiration. One as a body, and one soul united through the truth of a perfect union.

I understand now that the truth reveals divergent paths. Are there no rules when it comes to love, should there BE so much hurt and disappointment for such a wondrous thing?

Woe, I say, for the aggrieved soul that is floating, as a bit of flotsam doth float in the sea, to recover a loss, is like waiting on the fallen rain to grow a single flower, slow as time passes, yet, fully and meaningful.

Once again, life starts anew, and leaves the weathered and confused soul to recover.





To Err is Human, to be Drunk, Divine


Those of you who read me regularly, already know that I am a Nymphomaniac, AND an alcoholic. Why do I keep repeating these two things, well, I want you to understand as a reader what makes me tick.

Ever since I was a wee child, I have always wanted to be a writer. I won’t tell you I’m a great writer, just a poor soul who enjoys writing and collaborating with my fellow man. Will I ever BE a great writer, probably not, but I will keep working at it until my dying day.

People have asked me why I don’t write a great fiction or mystery novel? I will tell you the same thing I told them, not interested. I would rather share my life stories, the good,  bad, and the ridiculous.

Throughout history, there have been many excellent alcoholic writers. Tennesse Williams, Dylan Thomas, F. Scott Fitzgerald and even Hemingway. On the women’s side, Dorothy Parker, Anne Sexton, Mary Karr, and Jacqueline Susann.

Why were they all under the influence when they wrote their great American novels? We may never know, as each of them had their own inner demons with whom they were dealing. If you asked ME why I’m a drunk, I would probably say, because I like the feeling that being in an altered state of reality gives me.

Anyway, back to writing, usually, when I write, I am drunk. Case in point, I am totally blitzed right now. Am I a bad person, or a slut, maybe, but in my defense, I have never KNOWLINGLY hurt anyone because of my alcoholism. When you’re a Nymphomaniac, the term slut just goes with the territory. I admit it, I AM a slut. It is a part of who I am.

When the alcohol kicks in, my sexual organs go into a frenzy like I was on cocaine. At that point, there is NO rhyme or reason, I NEED to get fucked. Actually, I could really use one right NOW.

So, let’s recap… I’m a drunk who loves to write, ALMOST as much as I like to get drunk and fuck. Who knows, maybe someday I’ll sit and write the great American novel, until then, I’m gonna have another drink and masturbate.

Until Later…






Wednesday’s Drunk Tales


I woke up today, hungover, and ready to do it all over again. I know what you’re saying, “Poor little rich girl…Awwww” but hey, I’m bored and I like to drink. What better way to relieve a hangover than with a few quick shots of vodka and wine.

I decided I would get good and shit faced, and then see how long it would take me to put on my make-up. I’m already om my fourth vodka mixed with wine, and I am starting to feel pretty good. My hangover is just about gone, and I am feeling as frisky as well, a drunk woman in need.

In case you were wondering, my day starts early. I was up and drinking at 6:45 AM, and to keep you updated, I’m now starting my fifth wine and shot of vodka.

I like to drink while wearing only my bra and panties. It gives me that feeling wild and wholly feeling, like I am a panther stalking her prey. For those of you who may be wondering, I am wearing a pink lace bra with a matching pink thong. I REALLY need to be fucked.

Sorry, I just stepped away for a moment while I let my fingers do the walking. Well, that, and a great vibrator…Wink!!! Anyway, I am really starting to feel the alcohol now. Each sip is heavenly, and slides down my gullet like a snake eating a mouse. God, I love being drunk. Number six is going down.

One more shot and I am gonna try the makeup thingy. It’s kinda funny because I just looked in the mirror and I see myself with glazed and half open eyes, and then, I notice my tits, they look MAHHVELOUS!!!!!

Moving on, base, foundation, sealer, rouge and mascara, some eye shadow and a nice gentle pink lipstick with some gloss. Holy SHIT, this took me 45 min. Sure, I look like a gorgeous drunk, ( with GREAT tits), but NOW, I’m so drunk, and I need a nap.  Shit, gotta go, feel free to take advantage of me, my legs will be spread and waiting. Until Later…



Dear Daddy

Dear Daddy:

Today I am sad and tears roll, as I write this. Today is the anniversary of the day you took your life when I was only 8 years old. Daddy, you were my hero and my everything.

We played together, fished together, and you taught me how to love others through your works. I miss you terribly daddy, and I wonder how things would have been different if you were still here to guide me.

I remember like yesterday,  you said you were going to the garage to get something, and then I heard that shot ring out. I rushed to the garage to see your body on the floor, with a river of blood all around you.

I was devastated, alone, and terrified. There was no comforting me as I ran to the neighbor’s house and evoked their help. My question is, why? You never seemed to be distraught as you left me crying in never ending tears.

I’m sure you know that mom couldn’t handle the pressure of living without you, and became an alcoholic. Thank God for aunt Carol, who fed and clothed me most of the time, and provided a stable environment.

I miss you daily daddy, and I am afraid that I too have used the wrong approach for dealing with my sadness. I am afraid that I have taken to behavior not unlike mom’s.

While I write this, I am drunk, and I ask you for your forgiveness. I have done well in the job portion of my life, daddy, well enough to live comfortably for the rest of my life.

On the other hand, my personal life sucks. I have never been able to make a lasting relationship with either men OR women. That’s right daddy, I am bisexual. I hope you would not have been disappointed.

I just want you to know that I respect and admire you. I was the classic daddy’s little girl. I love you daddy, now, and forever. I wish you were still here to guide me, but, I have been following your lead in helping the poor, and I know you would be proud.

I hope you are happy where you are daddy, and know that I pray for you daily.

All my love,

Your Little Princess



Holiday Cheer


Today is Wednesday, only five more days until Xmas and I have everything in order. Yup, tree up, decorations done, Christmas cookies done, bottle in hand and all is RIGHT with the world.

I hope all of you are celebrating the Holidays with your loved ones, and that each and every one of you is filled with Holiday Peace and Happiness. I love this time of year, we all come together as one, and spread love and harmony throughout the world.

 Sure, I’m inebriated, but none the less, I meant what I said. Each and every one of you are like family to me. You pick me up when I’m down, and you share in all my joys. Do you know what the best thing I love about all of you is though, you never JUDGE me. I am who I am, and STILL, you continue to read me. God Bless You!!!

So, to ALL of you who read me, and especially to those who comment on what I write, May I wish you the Happiest of Holidays, and may you continue to prosper now, and throughout your years.

All my Best…