If I Could Only Remember Where I Left My Pants
For those of you who read me, you know that on occasion, like Monday through Friday and SOMETIMES on the weekends (looks other way), I have a tendency to let’s just say get HAPPY…Sometimes I get SOOO happy, I forget what Happiness I had the night I was getting happy. Boy…THAT was a confusing sentence wasn’t it???
Anyway, since I’m going for the “cure”, I thought I would relate a sort of funny story that happened to me one night when I was in Vegas. This was ohhhh, about 3 years ago I think, I had had enough of the pressures of work and since I like to gamble, I decided I would go to Vegas.
I Love Vegas…Lights everywhere, wall to wall people, cheap food and all the free drinks you can swallow while playing in the Casinos. I usually stay at the Bellagio because I’m comped, so I packed my things, hopped on a plane and headed for Sin City…You KNOW why they call it Sin City don’t you…It’s because I’m there…Hehehe…
Well…I got there in the afternoon, checked it, and immediately went to the Black Jack table. I love Black Jack because it’s a game of percentages and I am ever so good with math…PLUS…I’m LUCKY!!! I sat down, put my chips on the table, ordered a Vodka Cranberry, and away I went.
I started this around 3PM and never left before Midnight. To say that I had had ONE too many would be an understatement, it was really about 8-10 too many. All I remember is riding some kind of Merry Go Round, (At least I THINK it was), and yelling out I’m WINNING…I’m WINNING…Things became a little fuzzy from there.
I remember meeting SOMEONE…Can’t remember whether they were male or female and I THINK I fell in the waters at the Bellagio ‘cause I remember (SORT of), saying Help me I’m drowning. Now remember, the actual water depth there is probably ONLY about 2 feet. I can’t really remember anything from that point on except waking up naked, in my bathroom, in the bathtub.
I got out of the bathtub, and on the mantle there was a note that read, “ Sooz…had a wonderful time last night, let’s do it again sometime.”, no name, no nothing. I went to the bedroom, looked for my clothes and NOTHING was there. No pants, no panties, no Bra…WTF??? Where were my clothes??? The only think I could THINK of was that this person wanted trophies…Yuck!!! Sicko!!!
The only other think I thought was funny, (BUT EMBARRASING), was when I went down to the Lobby to check out, the clerk said to me in a softened voice… “ Did you enjoy your SWIM”??? I turned BEET red and sheepishly check out to raise Hell another day…Yikes!!! Anybody wanna go to Vegas with me???
P.S. I have NO idea why this is so big…Yikes!!!