Why Does Tweety Bird Always Outfox Poor Sylvester

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“I tawt I taw a puddy tat!” “I did! I did taw a puddy tat!”

Okay, I have watched Looney Tunes cartoons since I was knee high to a grasshopper (???), and I must admit that I am quite surprised that Tweety Bird always seems to outfox Sylvester. How could a puny little bird with a LISP; EVER outsmart a cunning and much larger predator?

Here’s the thing that bothers ME about the cartoon, not ONLY does Tweety ALWAYS come off smelling like a rose, he is downright, yet cutely ARROGANT about the whole thing. It seems like each time Sylvester has Tweety in his grasp; either that mean old Bulldog or the old woman with the broom comes to save the day for this cute little BASTARD. REALLY???

Let’s face it, in the REAL world; Tweety would be a MEAL 99% of the time. It just isn’t right. At LEAST let’s have Tweety MAIMED or at the very least HOSPITALIZED once in a while. What’s the point of even WATCHING the cartoon if every time Tweety is just going to FOIL poor Sylvester’s attempts?

This seems to be a recurring theme in Looney Tunes cartoons. Take the Roadrunner and Wiley Coyote for example. Here again, no matter WHAT ingenious plan Coyote has, the Roadrunner always seems to always escape.  Again, the writers show the Roadrunner expressing some cute ARROGANCE by using his MEEP MEEP sounds. It’s as if he’s saying…”HA ha, you can’t catch me you stupid coyote.” Seriously folks, does THIS seem fair to you?

I say we go back and write our own endings. Hmmmm…Let’s see…How about once, when the old lady is about to save Tweety, she stumbles over her broom and breaks her arm preventing her from saving that arrogant little BASTARD. Or, perhaps when the bulldog is about to save him, Sylvester does what ALL cats can do, SCRATCH the living BEJESUS out of the dog’s eyes preventing it from seeing. Now THAT’S what I’m talking about.

What do you think? Would I make a great cartoon writer or WHAT?

Until Later…